Friday, May 27, 2011

WWJSD: What Would Jason Statham Do?

I have hit a plateau.

My 34 year old body says: That hollow leg you used to fill with 2nd’s and 3rd’s at dinner? That super high metabolism? That bone-skinny body that never gained weight?

Yeeeeah. That’s gone. Not comin’ back. Get over it.

Move. On.

Man. So now I have to actually WORK to get skinny? I have to feel the burn? Watch what I’m eating? But that sounds so much like….work. Yuck.

But I desperately want abs, real, cut, washboard stomach abs. And since people do accomplish this, professional trainers or not, that means it IS humanly possible to attain.

Ok, so now what do I do??

Well first I stumble upon (no pun intended!) an article about the one and only Jason Statham. For those of you that may (be living under a rock) not know him, he is an action star. He used to be an olympic swimmer back in the day and now he’s more stuntman then actor. He’s well trained in mixed martial arts and kickboxing, according to his IMDb profile. He’s ripped, that’s what he is. And how does he get that way…and stay that way?

Mr. Statham’s got access to this cool gym for stuntmen. They climb walls, throw weights around, spar with every kind of weapon imaginable---it sounds like you can do just about anything you want and if it’s something a knight, superhero or hitman would do? All the better! He did an interview with Men’s Health magazine a few years ago where he describes his routines and work-out schedule: 6 days a week, no more then 35 minutes a day. I’ve been doing like 60 minutes, 3-4 times a week. This man’s abs are “shredded” as they say and mine? Well, not so much. What gives?? (I want my abs!!!)

I’ll tell you what: that man did not have 3 babies!! AND I’m not eating like a monk. (A little whiny:) and I LIKE food! I’m not sure I could survive if I was eating power shakes and protein bars in between meals of spinach salad (no, not the good kind, with dressing and hard-boiled eggs and bacon, trust me) and a grilled chicken breast. Plain. I mean, what’s life if you aren’t enjoying things like EATING for God’s sake?? Look, I’m not a pig, I eat cookies but make sure it’s the serving size, not flopped on the couch eating half the package at once. I don’t eat chips. There’s no candy in my house. I rarely imbibe either alcohol or caffeine (except some regular green tea once in a while or a 75% defac/25% regular cup of coffee). No soda here. High fructose syrup? Me no likey. Organics, as much as I can afford. Whole grain all the way (or at least whole wheat!). Salad a few times a week. Activia yogurt every day. Digestive enzymes with at least one meal a day to aid my poor tummy in digestion.

Alright, to be fair, the man does a different combo of exercises 5 days a week, then does a sustained trail run for an hour every Saturday! Obviously, he’s working his butt off. On the other hand, he hates it. Just read the Men’s Health article and you’ll see what I mean!

My weakness: ice cream and baked goods. Sigh. Had me some excellent chocolate cookies and cream ice cream. And it wasn’t any ½ cup serving either!! I eat lots of fiber but don’t consume enough water to help it along. I exercise pretty hard, but not a consistent 3 days a week, like I did for about a month.

I need to make some changes.

This is what I have been thinking about making those changes:

1. My mother always says, “Our bodies are made to work.” Whenever I think “I’m too tired to workout, I don’t feel like it….” I remember that this is what my body is made to do and OF COURSE I can do it!

2. Having a wimpy mental partner will not help you. Whip that whiner into shape and make that voice your biggest cheerleader instead: “You can do this! You’re almost done, don’t quit now!”

3. Make. It. Fun. I use Just Dance 2, the Just Sweat option. I do the second program (I think it’s labeled “tough.”) I do that as my warm-up, then go lift weights, do crunches, etc or I go right from there to the Tae Bo Advanced 8 minute work-out (which is a reeeeaaallly long 8 minutes by the way!). Lately, I’ve been working out in the mornings and at about 4pm when the boys are getting wild, we all go for a walk. Like, a 45 minute walk! I’ve lost 2 more pounds this week just from doubling up my exercise like that. Also, rockin’ work out music helps you to keep going mentally.

4. I’m making an effort to steer clear of sweets and empty noshing. That’s the hardest part for me. When I find myself in front of the pantry, scanning (both the pantry and my taste buds: hmmm, what am I in the mood for?) I think: What Would Jason Statham Do?? (from here on to be shortened to “WWJSD?”) He wouldn’t eat cookies that’s for sure. I knew I had to get some things in there that I wouldn’t feel guilty eating. I found some organic white cheddar with flaxseed crackers that are great: crispy, crunchy, flavorful. I eat them with slices of cheese on top or with my yogurt. (great for digestion also!) I eat oatmeal now for lunch or my evening snack. The High Fiber kind, which I add raisins to. It’s filling and low fat. I go fix myself a cup of hot tea. And if I’m doing it because I’m bored? I turn to one of my hobbies: reading, blogging, graphic design, working on my novel. Crap, even getting something done on my To Do list is better then eating some junk and then feeling guilty! I don’t do guilt. I eat cake at birthday parties (it’s one piece, not the whole cake, nor is it daily) and ice cream during the week but try not to do it two nights in a row.

5. I need more sleep!! It makes me feel less crazy, my memory is better, and it is supposed to help you lose weight; heavy people tend to sleep less and they think there’s a connection there, a cycle. Your body goes into panic mode or something and starts storing up that fat, ready to burn for energy because you’re not resting enough!! Get some sleep already!! (Sadly, a picture of a woman on a cozy pillow, fast asleep, is one of the images on my vision board.)

So the next time you’re facing the pantry, feelin’ a little hungry, needin’ a little pick-me-up, wanting your sugar fix think of this:

What would Jason Statham do?


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  1. Love Jason Statham! Though I respectfully request he stay away from the Crank franchise. I also really love Just Dance. I haven't done it in awhile but the Just Sweat feature is great and it is a lot of fun. Thanks for the reminder.

  2. I LOVE this post. WWJSD indeed.

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